Thursday 11 September 2008
Monday 8 September 2008
why unfit people (me) shouldn't cycle.
a bike ride.
last night i had one of those "i need to get fit" kind of thoughts, so i decided that the most logical thing to do, after like over an year of doing "f**k all", was to wake up early and go for a bike ride across rugged and untameable terrain. i set out wearing the most attractive cycle gear i could find, put on some bad ass white boy rap, and got the bike out of the garage. fully intent on powering on a mega bike ride so i'd immediately be as buff as "Dolph Lungermen" i left the drive, turned left and began cycling, half way through my first song, i was actually knackered, the asthma came back with a vengeance, making my lungs burn with each breath, my legs were sore, my head was pounding and not even the delicate ryhmes of MC Lars could make me feel fine. however, i'd always been taught that breathlessness is a good thing when it comes to exercise, so i powered on. getting more and more and more and more and more and more and more tired. like seriously, not even the cooling powers of H2O could settle me. and then eventually when the gods of fat kid's exercising brought me a hill to belt down, however after riding full tilt into 3 nettle bushes and 2 muddie puddles, i was suitably sore, wet and tired. it was at this point that i decided the most logical thing to do was take a slightly shorter ride home, however after many panting wheel turns....i missed the turning, as opposed to a short jaunt home i went a mammoth trek back, nearlly getting run over twice and nearlly tasting bitter sweet tar at like three times. the cars looked embarassed to be on the same road as such a terrible cyclist. eventually i found a way home that incorporated 3 mega hills, the wind in my hair nearlly blowing the sweat out of my hair, i emphasise "nearlly" i'm hoping that the more i do it the more i will improve, and eventually i will be like that really good cycle guy i saw on tv during the olympics.
last night i had one of those "i need to get fit" kind of thoughts, so i decided that the most logical thing to do, after like over an year of doing "f**k all", was to wake up early and go for a bike ride across rugged and untameable terrain. i set out wearing the most attractive cycle gear i could find, put on some bad ass white boy rap, and got the bike out of the garage. fully intent on powering on a mega bike ride so i'd immediately be as buff as "Dolph Lungermen" i left the drive, turned left and began cycling, half way through my first song, i was actually knackered, the asthma came back with a vengeance, making my lungs burn with each breath, my legs were sore, my head was pounding and not even the delicate ryhmes of MC Lars could make me feel fine. however, i'd always been taught that breathlessness is a good thing when it comes to exercise, so i powered on. getting more and more and more and more and more and more and more tired. like seriously, not even the cooling powers of H2O could settle me. and then eventually when the gods of fat kid's exercising brought me a hill to belt down, however after riding full tilt into 3 nettle bushes and 2 muddie puddles, i was suitably sore, wet and tired. it was at this point that i decided the most logical thing to do was take a slightly shorter ride home, however after many panting wheel turns....i missed the turning, as opposed to a short jaunt home i went a mammoth trek back, nearlly getting run over twice and nearlly tasting bitter sweet tar at like three times. the cars looked embarassed to be on the same road as such a terrible cyclist. eventually i found a way home that incorporated 3 mega hills, the wind in my hair nearlly blowing the sweat out of my hair, i emphasise "nearlly" i'm hoping that the more i do it the more i will improve, and eventually i will be like that really good cycle guy i saw on tv during the olympics.
Sunday 7 September 2008
a lament for Charlie Pace (and other Lost thoughts)
i f**kin' love Lost. not metaphorical "oh i'd well love some tea right now" love, but full on "you want my toes? you got it!" love. & as a result it controls my decisions slightly. "sam wanna go play pool?" "no Lost is on, our friendship cannot withstand it's pearly bonds." irrationality thy name is lost, and i love it for that. 4 8 15 16 23 42.
today at like 10ish i started watching "Planet Terror" even before it began i was like, "i dunno if i wanna watch a film" but i pushed on regardless, then Sayid came on the screen and demanded some man's balls, he got them. and i was like "y'know whats awesome? Sayid...in Lost." then jeff fahey came on screen and i was like "season 4 of lost was pretty dope" and so i was decided that "Planet Terror" deserved my full un-divided attention, the last thing i want to do is anger robert rodriquez (and bruce mother f**kin' willis) so i switched it off and slapped in a DVD of Lost, Season Three Disc Six Episodes 21, 22 and 23. (Greatest Hits and Through the Looking Glass Parts 1&2) warning: major Lost spoilers ahead (if you ain't seen season 3) now as any discerning Lost fan knows, the loveable manc Charlie Pace died, heroically and emotionally, at the end of season 3, so for 13 f**kin' episodes (excluding the Hurley vision) i (and all Lost fans) have been sans Mr.Pace, and in re-watching these episodes, pre-death, i realise just how much i miss Charlie, he was a delight. funny, insightful, vulnerable, loveable and english. and the love of his life Claire hasn't been the same since his untimely passing. i mean Claire's ace, but she's cut up, as we all are, about Charlie's passing. he always made me smile even in the most dire of circumstances and his ultimate buddy partnership with Hurley was destined for greatness. sadly twas cut short, i always maintain that the ultimate flash forward would be them two taking down a corrupt government from the outside with brute force, flair and hilarious puns, but alas...he truly was a joy to watch. and his relationship with turnip head (aaron) was too f**kin' cute. we are worse for having lost him, and anyone who didn't like him "f**kin' Lost Iniative f**ks" are idiots, actual idiots.
also Karl and Alex were taken before their time, their love was wonderful, they were destined for superhero greatness, like Susan Storm and Mr Fantastic but without Jessica Alba and not a bit poor (like the film, not the comics)
i will defend Lost to the end. any silly complaints about anything Lost related will be met with vengeance...by me....swiftly.
Charlie Pace was a Hero, and not in the s**tty "Heroes" sense.
1979 - 2004
(in Lost terms)
1979 - 2004
(in Lost terms)
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