i am, by my very nature, a very curious person. it's like the age old fact of life that if someone says "don't think of a black cat" you will instantly think of a black cat. same by if someone says "don't look at this, it's awful" you will look.
this happened to me recently. it was awful. and i regret it, to this very day. i was in the library and someone had left their laptop on. and the interent connected. so rather than focus on my work i choose to watch some videos on youtube. as you do. a good friend of mine suggested to me some videos. they were funny, i enjoyed them. i'm not gonna lie i lol'ed. also listenend to some classic tunes. (alexisonfire - young cardinals. treat your ears.) and then he said "oh. when she gets back, put jarsquatter on..." naturally i asked what it was, he said "you don't want to know. it's awful"
i was going to put it on, but a library is a decent place and whilst it is ok from time to time to speak loudly it is most definetly not ok to put things on other folks computers that have been actively described as "awful". so i didn't, i revised. or tried to.
that evening. i had a few drinks and got a leetle bit tipsy. came home and looged on to the old firefox. curiosity kicked in. what was this video, what did it entail? i though "whats the worse thing that could happen?" so in my drunken curious state, i watched it. ye gads. it is truly awful. truly awful. when i closed my eyes, i saw it in my mind's eye. harrowing.
now another thing has been mentioned to me, the pain olympics, i'm not going to lie.
curiosity is kicking in...
i just don't want to feel ill again. i get that enough when i go into our shower...
it's a good thing i'm only drinking relentless. at the moment.
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